The selection
The four candidates drew lots to find out which of us would go on when. I picked the third slot.
The other three candidates were there with their partners - two wives and a husband. They are the really long-suffering ones. All of them had traipsed along to several selection meetings - usually at a weekend, often half the way across the country from home. And their role - to smile sweetly, say nothing controversial and somehow look supportive.
I'd forgotten the natural camaraderie between competing candidates in a final. It's almost as if you were all on the same side rather than pitted against each other. Gallows humour flowed freely. I raised a few eyebrows by wondering if the three of us who weren't successful that night could smuggle a little Polonium-210 into the House of Commons tea room and get the sitting MP among us to administer it to some of his more venerable colleagues' afternoon tea.
An hour later it was my turn. The interviews were being conducted by Michael Brown, former MP for Brigg and Scunthorpe in north Lincolnshire and now a political reporter and columnist for The Independent. Three things stand out. The first was when Michael challenged me to explain how a 'metropolitan tieless Tory' could hope to represent a rural Midlands seat like Grantham and Stamford. This was a bit of a gift as I reminded him - and the audience - that I had spent my entire childhood in the countryside, that my family's home was a small farm in Devon and that, during my short-lived mayoral campaign in London, people had constantly asked how a country bumpkin like me could hope to be Mayor of London!
The second was when the lights went out. Completely. Plunging the entire room into pitchy blackness. Grasping feebly for something to break the tension, I remembered the old cinema ad: 'hang on to your things before somebody else does.' It raised a nervous titter. But not much more.
The third was the end. When I got a warm round of applause and left the room thinking, 'Well, I gave it my best shot."
Hallelujah. My best shot was good enough!
The other three candidates were there with their partners - two wives and a husband. They are the really long-suffering ones. All of them had traipsed along to several selection meetings - usually at a weekend, often half the way across the country from home. And their role - to smile sweetly, say nothing controversial and somehow look supportive.
I'd forgotten the natural camaraderie between competing candidates in a final. It's almost as if you were all on the same side rather than pitted against each other. Gallows humour flowed freely. I raised a few eyebrows by wondering if the three of us who weren't successful that night could smuggle a little Polonium-210 into the House of Commons tea room and get the sitting MP among us to administer it to some of his more venerable colleagues' afternoon tea.
An hour later it was my turn. The interviews were being conducted by Michael Brown, former MP for Brigg and Scunthorpe in north Lincolnshire and now a political reporter and columnist for The Independent. Three things stand out. The first was when Michael challenged me to explain how a 'metropolitan tieless Tory' could hope to represent a rural Midlands seat like Grantham and Stamford. This was a bit of a gift as I reminded him - and the audience - that I had spent my entire childhood in the countryside, that my family's home was a small farm in Devon and that, during my short-lived mayoral campaign in London, people had constantly asked how a country bumpkin like me could hope to be Mayor of London!
The second was when the lights went out. Completely. Plunging the entire room into pitchy blackness. Grasping feebly for something to break the tension, I remembered the old cinema ad: 'hang on to your things before somebody else does.' It raised a nervous titter. But not much more.
The third was the end. When I got a warm round of applause and left the room thinking, 'Well, I gave it my best shot."
Hallelujah. My best shot was good enough!


